Who, Indeed

I talked to a woman the other day about something or other, and I said something to the affect of: “You don’t really believe that, do you?” She had an interesting answer. “Yes, I choose to believe what makes me happy, regardless of whether it is true”, she said without hesitation.
That impressed me. Because, she was right. If she can, and probably will, live her entire life in a fantasy, it will make no difference that it was a construct of a separate reality. She is intelligent enough to know that her life can be lived as merely an elaborate game. Win or lose. I do the same thing. Choose to believe what makes me the happiest…I guess.

Neat thing, fantasy.
There are many types. But can you live a fantasy? I’m sure there are many out there that stumbled upon or arranged to try, sexual ones. If you are like me, you were sorely disappointed. But that didn’t stop you from continuing to have these ultra-reality wishes. Life in the Occident is much like that in my view. This woman tries equally as hard to hold her constructed view of the universe together, as I try to deconstruct it, I’m sure. But who gains and who loses? Hard to say. Seeing through propaganda, as I pride myself in doing, gives me quite a bit of vain satisfaction. And a heads up to coming failures in this material world that can effect me personally. But even this view has a price. I have spent my life trusting no one and questioning everything. A dyed-in-the-wool skeptic. Freedom from believing anyone’s agenda.  My anger at social norms started early and has simmered ever since. Not a really great way to spend my one and only existence. But Freedom tastes of reality.

And that may be. But what about this woman of whom I speak? Isn’t she equally plagued? Of course she is. She works tirelessly at keeping this fantasy that is fed her alive. She also enjoys the few benefits of her choices in life. But she has to believe in every aspect…all the lies…all the games…all the ‘stuff’. That must be very trying. Especially when, as I know, most of the time it doesn’t make any real sense. Not the greatest way for her to spend her one and only existence. 
Who would be both have been if neither of us had to put so much effort toward our acceptance or rejection of the machinations of psychopaths, I wonder. Who would any of us be if we got to deal with our own existence without having to address the artificial influence of hierarchical input of others? Funny old world.
Now if we both live another 100 years, I think my world-view would prove to be the correct one. But if we both died tomorrow(which is more likely than another century of life) who would have lived the most productive life; who would have spent their time on this earth the best way, I wonder. In today’s vernacular:

I’m all like,
and she’s like

But I think each should consider the view of the other. Of course there are many more ‘hers’ than those like me. But that doesn’t matter. We both started from the same tunnel of darkness with the same expectations, really. To figure out wtf all this light means and how to negotiate through it to another dark tunnel. Neither is necessarily right or wrong in the big picture. Neither deserves praise or condemnation for our choices.

I think judaism is the foe in my short span of years in our world’s history. She thinks she can refinance her house for a better rate and spend the equity on a cruise to the Bahamas next spring no matter who gives or takes her money and labor. I will be typing and she will be drinking margaritas in the sunshine. 
One thing we can both agree on…life can suck. Between her cruises and my essays here that few read or understand, we will both die within a score of years and who will know the difference?


6 thoughts on “Who, Indeed

  1. You made my weekend with this one.Why not joining her on the cruise and showing her the reality of a hard-on. It could be a mutual reality consensus.Have a nice oneMartin

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